He watched it all, face impassive, mostly just to see what she was afraid of, why she was hiding her face. As each vision flashed, he didn't need to see the whole situation to understand what they were about. Their minds were literally hooked together through the Drift, which probably wasn't actually real but whatever magic was behind this little adventure made the link real enough.
He felt them as if he was the one that had lived them, her feelings, but filtered slightly through the lens of what his own would've been facing the same things. It all bled together in the Drift, especially since so much of it was rooted in something Raph understood intimately: protecting one's own.
- they'd have to watch as events played out, unable to say goodbye to the daughter they knew they were going to lose, after setting up so many to die, playing games with their lives, after trying to kill the whole world, after launching their daughter into the same life that got her killed by being evil -
- despite not trusting him (her?) Raph had still decided to go back for Xavin, because protecting your own wasn't the only thing in this world and 'your own' sometimes had to be extended to new people if people you loved loved them -
- confused and exhilarated over surviving, he just wanted comfort, wanted to feel normal things, wasn't thinking, didn't mean to hurt Gert, why did he always run to the arms of the nearest warm body? Was there something wrong with him? Was it -
- it was always a mess and these were supposed to be his friends but they kept doing this, getting caught up in their own drama and he shouldn't have kissed Chase, what if something happened to Molly, it'd be all his fault -
Guilt and shame and guilt and so many normal, normal feelings. Lost feelings. The kinds of feelings someone had when their whole world got upended and they thought they were a worse person than they actually were.
"Nico." Raph knelt down next to her and pulled her in for a tight hug. His voice was soft. "Oh, Nico."
It wasn't disappointment, it wasn't accusation, it was sadness over how sad she was and she'd feel it practically radiating off him, his wanting her to be happy. He held her with no hidden motives, nothing he wanted from her, just beaming out all he wanted to give, comfort and security and friendship and kindness and understanding.
"What'd I tell you before? I was right, y'know. You're so normal. Mixed up feelings from a mixed up life and you don't even realize how okay that is, do you?" his voice was incredibly gentle. "It's alright. You've got nothing to hide and nothing to be ashamed of."
no subject
He felt them as if he was the one that had lived them, her feelings, but filtered slightly through the lens of what his own would've been facing the same things. It all bled together in the Drift, especially since so much of it was rooted in something Raph understood intimately: protecting one's own.
- they'd have to watch as events played out, unable to say goodbye to the daughter they knew they were going to lose, after setting up so many to die, playing games with their lives, after trying to kill the whole world, after launching their daughter into the same life that got her killed by being evil -
- despite not trusting him (her?) Raph had still decided to go back for Xavin, because protecting your own wasn't the only thing in this world and 'your own' sometimes had to be extended to new people if people you loved loved them -
- confused and exhilarated over surviving, he just wanted comfort, wanted to feel normal things, wasn't thinking, didn't mean to hurt Gert, why did he always run to the arms of the nearest warm body? Was there something wrong with him? Was it -
- it was always a mess and these were supposed to be his friends but they kept doing this, getting caught up in their own drama and he shouldn't have kissed Chase, what if something happened to Molly, it'd be all his fault -
Guilt and shame and guilt and so many normal, normal feelings. Lost feelings. The kinds of feelings someone had when their whole world got upended and they thought they were a worse person than they actually were.
"Nico." Raph knelt down next to her and pulled her in for a tight hug. His voice was soft. "Oh, Nico."
It wasn't disappointment, it wasn't accusation, it was sadness over how sad she was and she'd feel it practically radiating off him, his wanting her to be happy. He held her with no hidden motives, nothing he wanted from her, just beaming out all he wanted to give, comfort and security and friendship and kindness and understanding.
"What'd I tell you before? I was right, y'know. You're so normal. Mixed up feelings from a mixed up life and you don't even realize how okay that is, do you?" his voice was incredibly gentle. "It's alright. You've got nothing to hide and nothing to be ashamed of."